Nearlyweds (2013) Reviews

• Stupid and Maddening

  rebekahrox2014-04-12

  This Hallmark movie had no characters worth rooting for. All 3 of the husbands were class "A" stupid jerks. All of their better halves could have done so much better considering their beauty, overall niceness, and successful careers. But they still settled for their men with one (thank-God) exception with a minimum of grovelling on their part. Naomi Judd (why do women who aspire to be actresses freeze their faces?) is a truly evil pervert and her husband, oops, son, is so in her thrall and so weak and naive that words fail. She literally almost murders her daughter-in-law, a doctor, by the way, and all is forgiven after a not very believable apology. The solution to their little problem is that the couple pay her to move out of the house she should not have been in to begin with. Stupid girl #2 makes a fool out of herself longing for and stalking a husband who hires as his secretary his ex-high school sweetheart, "his first love," he tells her, who tortured and bullied his new (very cute) wife when they were teenagers. And he has the gall to leave her when she dares to call him on it. Our heroine #3, actually does not take her psychotically controlling male chauvinist future wife abuser back, even though he begs her (quite satisfyingly). She would have been OK had it not been for her devotion to her very irritating dog, causing a modicum of sympathy for the husband. It is hard to enjoy a movie when 5 out of 6 protagonists is worthy of nothing but contempt.

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• Very fine rom-com with attractive performers and a hoot turn by Naomi Judd

  inkblot112015-01-05

  Erin, Casey and Stella all decided on a June wedding so these gals are newly weds three times over. But, alas, problems arrive. Casey, who owns a dog care business and lives in the apartment right below, experiences woe when a former flame of her new hubby's applies for the job as his assistant. She gets it, ugh. Naturally, the husband doesn't see a problem. Stella, alas, discovers her mate is one domineering guy. Yes, he's wealthy and successful, so Stella had a secure feeling, but he soon resists her accepting a terrific job for herself, saying she doesn't need to work. Meanwhile, Dr. Erin has the difficult mother in law of all mothers in law, Renee (Naomi Judd) move in with her and her handsome husband. What results is no privacy, no peace. Into these situations comes an even greater curveball. It appears the minister who conducted all of their ceremonies passed away before he could sign the marriage certificates. NONE of them are truly married in the eye of the law. The gals learn this information and wait to tell their partners, for all of them are now having second thoughts about their futures together. Will these folks all walk down the aisle again in a month or so? This fun film has one attractive, talented cast although none of the stars is famous, except Judd, who is a hoot and a half as the domineering mama. Also quite gorgeous are the costumes, sets, and makeup jobs. Add on a clever script and a fine direction and the end game is a nice rom-com for all dedicated fans and even those who aren't.

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• We're Not Married

  boblipton2013-01-13

  Three newly married women discover they are not actually married in this 2013 Hallmark Channel movie. The same gimmick was used in a minor comedy in 1952, WE'RE NOT MARRIED and its appearance here is also a gimmick, permitting the makers to hold the sanctity of marriage at risk without using the ugly word "Divorce". The point here is laid out in the prologue: do you want a marriage or just a wedding? Although the focus is on the women, the serious point underlying this movie is that couples must talk and reach agreement. Although the situations are sitcom material -- one has an evil mother in law, another has her old high school tormentor and ex-girlfriend of her husband working for him and the third has gotten a dog and he wants a baby -- all the actors are good looking and very competent. I wouldn't go looking for this one, but if you find yourself looking at it, you should stick until the end.

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• Not wedded bliss

  Prismark102015-02-07

  This Hallmark film starts out brightly when the priest speaks to the camera but once he collapses it rapidly descends downhill. Erin, Casey and Stella all decided on a June wedding so these gals are newlyweds but it seems that the minister who conducted all of their ceremonies passed away before he could sign the marriage certificates. They will have to go through a ceremony again but some of them might have second thoughts after the first few weeks of marriage. Casey gets upset when an ex-girlfriend gets a job working for her new husband. Erin a doctor finds that her mother in law is pushy and resents her for taking her son away. Stella has a rich but domineering husband who does not want her to have a career. The film is derivative, fails poorly as a rom-com. The husbands are so bad you wonder why these ladies married them in the first place.

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• A Slow Start Make for A Very Long Two Hours

  garyhvizdak2013-01-13

  Good acting, good cinematography, and good direction cannot save a boring screen play. During the first 85 minutes I wondered to myself several times whether it was worth it to continue watching. The only thing that kept me from turning off the TV was a made-up game I created, where I tried to guess the outcome. I did enjoy the interactions between the three almost married couples, and the interactions between the three girl friends. The three things that most detracted from the story were: 1) The dog. 2) The mother-in-law. 3) The ex-girlfriend. As written, these three characters were over-the-top to the point of being painful.

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